Archive for February, 2009

RIP 5kg Bag of Sugar

Saturday, February 21st, 2009

Today is a dark day, I had to finally lay to rest that 5kg bag of sugar I bought… well I don’t know when. I’d be tempted to say 6 months ago if not longer. I honestly can’t remember when I last had to buy sugar, which I think is a bad thing but I can’t help but see it as a good on ^o)

What this does mean is sometime later this week I’ll have to buy sugar, and thus a new 5kg bag can enter office for a fresh term \o/

In other news I’ve now broken the smileys on the site after having a fiddle to add a couple more, I’ve inadvertently replaced the sites file (Which is out of date anyhow, I really must update) with an even older version which is causing it to throw up all sorts of shit :/ I didn’t really want to spend my last day of holiday reinstalling the website, so I’m going to put it off… Oh never mind I managed to find a file to replace it with yay ^_^

X-COM

Saturday, February 21st, 2009

When asked about my favourite game series, I’ll stumble around trying to think of one. All the usual ones fly off… Resident Evil, Mortal Kombat (The early years at least), Grand Theft Auto. Then you get to the lesser known ones: Syndicate, Life & Death, Emergency. But everytime, I forget one. But its one I shouldn’t, its one of the most stand out games I’ve ever played. The first game perplexed me so much as a youth, that despite not actually succeeding at the main aspect of the game for months I was still drawn into it as I kept trying until eventually I completed a mission

UFO Defence (Or X-COM: Enemy Unknown as I’ve always known it) started the X-COM (Extraterrestrial Combat Unit) series. A turn based isometric team based shooter. That was for the missions anyhow, the rest of the game was made up of a world map where you had various different tasks: base building, researching, manufacturing. There was so much to it. You start equipped with the best that Earth has to offer in the face of an increasing alien menace, your clearly under equipped and have your arse handed to you on numerous occasions. Eventually you’ll kill some aliens, win a mission and retrieve some items you need to research to known what to do with. So you take it back, do some work and you start getting better equiped and can start taking the fight to the aliens

To most this would probably be one of the most boring concepts you could talk about, I mean combat is essentially a dodgy looking tabletop boardgame but its due to this design that it allows you to be more strategic than other games. Even with its somewhat limited repetoire of abilities and equipment you’ll find yourself flanking the enemy, proceeding with standard room to room clearance and charging into suicide runs with naught but a primed grenade. The latter of which I think was more of poor forethought by myself. A similar technique is achieved by running into a downed UFO to find you’ve used all your action points and in trying to flee the craft, you end up ending your turn with your back turned on 4 aliens with Heavy Plasmas

The second title in the series, Terror From The Deep (A very B-Movie title) is kind of like the first. In that it is the first, but its been reskinned and is stupidly bugged. For instance, if you research a certain item before another you can’t complete the game. I don’t know the items because I’ve never bared with the title long enough to do it justice. Basically to make some quick money, the publishers had a team sit down and make a sequal based off the original in a matter of a few months. Had TFTD been done by the original team it could have been a completely different prospect. One day I’ll play this game on its own merit, but I can’t help but feel it insignificant in comparison to its older brother

After ending the 1st alien war and everyone settling back down, a second menace was discovered that had been lying dormant under the oceans for decades. X-COM was called back into action, having somehow lost all knowledge of everything gained from the 1st war (A careless oversight due to its rushed nature, though in fairness I can’t imagine Plasma weapons being of much use underwater, but to have them still recognised as existing would have been nice. Or at least some of the items that would have worked still in use) your in the same boat (lol) as in the 1st game, under equipped, outnumbered and failing miserably. Kill, research, kill things better, kill the aliens, save the world

Number 3, Apocalypse. Oh noes, more aliums! Times moved on again and most of the world lives in these sprawling metropolises called Mega Cities. UFOs are being sited and people are panicking! X-COM reforms, under equipped, badly funded, still lacking all the equipment from previous wars. Although this game at least has alien sympathisers in so acknowledges the games history somewhat. Bit more of an interesting affair this one, combat got a real time option to appeal to a wider audience. There were more vehicles to purchase such as hovercars and craft, and they were upgradable with new engines and stuff like that which was fairly swish. Kill, research, discover some drastic twists regarding the aliens, travel through their portals, gradually destroy their homebase, discover another big twist, research, kill them all, save the world and be happy ^_^

Number 4, X-COM Interceptor. A space fighting sim with base building. Instead of a world map, you now have a galaxy, with solar systems and what not. Kill, research, kill better, discover some twists, go through some portals, blow up a sun and be done with it. I remember this game quite fondly despite it being, well… pretty shit. I managed to complete the game relatively easily and get the good-bad ending (There of course being “YOU FAILED!” and the good-good ending) which in my eyes was better than the other one. I blew up the aliens solar system but by launching the final missile strike from my craft I had taken too much damage to my engines and was unable to move to get back to my carrier to be warped back home. So I had to watch for 5 minutes as the missile headed into their sun before the end sequence cut in and it nova’d everything to shit, me included. Thus followed a broadcast to everyone on Earth of my final moments and how I’d saved the world but taken my own life in the process, dying a hero :’) The good good ending involves firing, back to carrier, back to base, everyones happy, yay, dullness

Number… something. Probably 1.5 or 2.5, I’m not sure. X-COM E-mail. While not strictly a fully fledged game, it still exists. It was essentially the X-COM multiplayer, allowing you and a friend to play as the aliens or humans over the internet without having to worry about the lag of dial-up \o/ The game is still played today apparently, albeit in a hacked format that allows you to either hot seat with the game or play over the internet without the arsing about of the old email server sytem

Now this is where the original X-COM games ended. Microprose folded leaving the rights to another company which then got passed around like a bad christmas present you send to someone else the following year. A few titles were under development:

X-COM Genesis – A remake of the original which was going to bring the graphics upto a Syndicate Wars level which would have been nice, it got canned when Mythos who were making it got shelved

X-COM Alliance – A First Person Shooter! With its roots still set in the “kill, research. kill better” idealogy, again it would have been a nice addition, though it got canned and later resurfaced with all its fun gutted out of it in the form of X-COM Enforcer. Another game I never played, although I do own it

There was quite a delay and then followed the “kind of official” sequels. Aftermath, Aftershock and Afterlight. Until recently I never accepted them as being part of the X-COM universe but I feeltaking them on their own merits, they’re not actually that bad. I haven’t read all too much into them because I still kind of want to play them but don’t at the same time

Aftermath picks up “the day after tomorrow” as the game states, alien space craft appears, releases spores into atmosphere, they fall to earth and suffocate most of everything. Cue you as commander of the survivors as they band together to do what they can and defend the Earth. Kill, research, kill better

In Aftershock the survivors fled to an orbiting space station with the help of your alien menace (I don’t know the technicalities, only that its not the good-good option from the previous ending its more of the good-bad option but there you go) you lose contact with Earth and need to find out whats happened. Kill, research, kill better. Apparently this game is one of the buggiest games released, even after its been patched. Though there is a community thats done what they can to further fix a broken game

Afterlight happens at the same time as Aftershock, only on Mars. When the spore survivors fled to the space station, some were sent to Mars as well where they were to terraform it when they awoke from a cryo sleep. Only when they start they unearth something they shouldn’t have done. Kill, research, kill better, but do it slightly different than other times

On top of all that you have teams that are working on remakes of the original UFO Defence game. Games such as Project Xenocide and UFO: Alien Invasion as well as one that was released at retail called UFO Extraterrestrials. Albeit not quite being a remake, but continuing on from the original as if the aliens had defeated us. Oh plus let me not forget the 2 novels spawned from the series!

Theres a lot to the series, but in my eyes theres only one game you need to play to get the idea of it (As if it wasn’t apparent from all of that above anyhow :P ) If you’ve never played UFO Defence, your doing yourself an injustice. I would seriously recommend at least trying to have a go at it, if not then read all you can about it. Its a sublime game and one I’m going to go play once I’ve finished writing this. First base will be in Russia near Novosisbirsk (sp?) to cover most of the original funding nations, then earn enough coin to setup a second base in North America to cover all that land mass, with a further well defended radar station over the Artic to trace UFOs across both continents. Researching lasers to reduce overheads and not have to worry about ammo anymore and research the plasma craft weapons to have something decent to shoot them down with. Good times

Holy shit just googled to see how much the books were to buy and discovered that the original PSX game (The NTSC version at least) would now set you back about £30 :s and to buy the book would cost you over $90. I originally got the PSX game from a second hand game store in coventry I think it was for less than a fiver not long after it was out, and I got the book from a charity shop in london for £1 :E I don’t even think I have it anymore :( Also stumbled onto LittleBigAdventure, another hard to get a hold of title I remember playing. I got stuck in the sewer when I couldn’t get on the back of that arsing turtle

Maybe Its Time…

Wednesday, February 11th, 2009

Updating my Facebook this evening led to me reuploading all the pictures from here. Thanks to its limit of no more than 60 pictures per album, I was forced to try and sort the pictures out (Which is impossible due to my lack of foresight into retrojaffas ‘a picture per article’ numbering scheme which meant 1, 10 and 100 all came first rather than 001, 002 and 003 -_-) This is probably the first time I’ve looked through the pictures in a long time, it made me chuckle how many stories and articles I could recite from looking at the picture alone

Its pretty much for this reason, I’m starting to post again. Its been a good 6 months since anything on this site was posted frequently, in a way I miss it as much as I hate it

So here goes again :D

I’m going to redesign the header a bit, its a tad outdated now and I can’t be arsed and probably never will remake Virtual Benny in its former glory, though god knows one day I’ll try again. Maybe time to freshen up those links on there too, not sure what I’ll do with the galleries, theres nothing strictly wrong with them but the gaming one is due a mass makeover if not a removal

So what have I been upto in the past 6 months, in all honesty… seemingly nothing. I’ve become quite the dull lifeform in recent times. You always plan to do so much and then nothing ever materialises :/ I guess that kind of ties in with retrojaffa too. I’ve had so many grand schemes that have just not seen fruition. I’ve even gone to the efforts of trying to create a new site to spur me on (Sorry RJ :( ) Maybe now I’ll look into some of them seriously, and maybe something will become of the other site, although I’m always having payment problems with that one for some reason

I’ve been building upto sorting myself out to go to the gym to kind of get myself more active, I see myself as a bit of a mess recently. I don’t walk anywhere, I don’t really socialise properly (Although I’m making concerted efforts towards righting that) and I don’t even really feed myself properly. If I was looking after a cat somebody would have reported me for neglect already

Before I bore myself by going on and moping in a quite typically emo-blog-like fashion, I’m going to drop myself some action points that I need to do here, as reminders. And anyone that reads them can feel free to hassle me until I do them. Even if poking is involved, just not in the belly button cos that proper freaks the shit out of me:

  • Make the achievements system you talked about for so long you cock
  • Sort out a driving license, you chuckle at everyone elses so let them chuckle at yours
  • Renew your railcard, its costing you a fortune not to!
  • Update the header, VB ain’t happening
  • Learn to skydive, it gets you out (lol)
  • Get to the gym, your a mess
  • Cook a real meal once a week, it’ll give you something to post about at least

I think that’ll do for now, so until my next post (Which will more than likely just be editing this list and marking a couple of points off like editing the website layout) heres a picture with the correct numbering scheme!

And yes that is me riding on the back of the seagull of destiny